Dear Joanna;
Almost forgot, about why I didn't take any pictures- I tried to take some, but my camera isn't working. It keeps saying the memory card has a problem. Is it full or something? I'm so aggravated with it. I had so many pictures to show you and I wanted to change the background... so you could see my ugly plastic hangers. Haha
Saturday, January 22nd
Today wasn't so bad. I got up at 11. What the hell? It means I've slept about 10-11 hours. Shit. I need to put myself on a better sleep schedule.I went to Flushing and got my new phone. I got a texting phone, baby~ Just wait til I get a texting plan. I will start bothering everyone I know with stupid texts. I wish I could take pictures for you~ The camera on my new phone sucks. I also get 4 months of Internet, (some kind of trial), so let's see if it makes me update this blog more...
So the rest of the day was a family day, and you don't know about these, so let me explain. When my dad takes a day off and me and my siblings have no school, we'll all out go to Flushing for grocery shopping and whatnot. After getting my phone, we went grocery shopping. So me and my brother and sister toss a bunch of snacks in the cart like usual, and then we went to Costco- the one by Century 21. I thought of you and wondered how you were when I was there. :) Great, now I'm crazy about those emoticons.
The one thing I hate about these days is that we go in the car. I get carsick SO BAD. I wanted to play video games when I got home, but I had a massive headache so I just watched TV.... Wow and not much happened.
Oh, I got my Allure magazine~ My subscription's ending in April, I think? I'm not renewing. Sick and tired of these magazines because most of their stuff is one big advertisement. The advice is always the same, and the 'editor's favorites' are chosen by the beauty companies who pay to have their products on that page. Only some stuff is trustworthy, like that one article I read about Coty Airpsun Face Powder, which really works, and is great. (But it's a pretty old and hard to find product, so I don't think the company paid for it? I don't know) The only thing I'm renewing is 17 magazine because as stupid as it is sometimes, it makes me laugh and is really fun to read. I love reading the romance section~ I am dying for a romance, but at the same time, I don't want one.
I want to fall in love because I consider it the best feeling in the world, but at the same time, I'm too messed up to be in a functional relationship. I would be clingy or whiny or dependent. Right now I can't handle it. Also, I've had my fortune told, and according to Chinese people, this is pretty accurate (the fortunes are all in this one book) and it says that this year, I will fall madly in love but the guy will think of me as just a friend. HOW CRUSHING IS THAT? Oh, and I'd be very studious. Like I care! I don't want my heart broken again. Wait for it, Joanna, I'm going to be writing long letters soon about this perfect guy that I've just met in my class. *sigh*
OK, and then I had my fortune told again. My aunt and mom did it first, and it was pretty accurate, so when it came to my turn, I got the most disappointing love thing ever: I will be torn between two guys: One of them is my dream guy, the kind of guy I am naturally attracted to: He's charming, social, easy to talk to, outgoing, basically, all the stuff I'm not and he talks sweet bullshit to me and I buy everything he says. The other guy is someone like me, quiet, saves his money, works hard (that's not like me, though... haha) and I will find him kind of boring. The thing is, boring guy loves me a lot and will be the best marriage match for me. If I marry boring guy, the marriage will last a long time and be nice and I'll grow to like him. Bullshitter would make it clear that he is settling for me, and I would take the chance because I love his sorry ass and I am so attracted to him. But the marriage won't be so great because he thinks he can do better and I would probably be trying to match his standards.
What can I do but refuse both guys? I don't want a relationship where the love is so unequal, you know? Someone who loves me more than I love him or someone who doesn't love me as much as I love him?
So I will end up alone, bitter, with maybe a fabulous career but a shit love life and a string of crappy affairs. I was seriously so disappointed, but now I'm not going to take this so seriously. I can change my life and I will. I will fall madly in love with boring guy and kick bullshitter in the face. It's going to work, for realz. The reason why I think this fortune is so real is because I don't even understand it. It's based on a bunch of Chinese stuff like the hour and year you were born, and some other stuff. Also, my mom's is scarily accurate. It predicted that my mom will marry someone just like my dad.
Haha, but no fortune is set in stone. Things change and you make better decisions and even if today is shit, tomorrow's another day, another chance to start over.
Love, Wendy. it's so late... crap.
Oh Wendy dear,
ReplyDeleteForget guys! You know what you need to do? Watch Sex and the City. I've recently started watching it and it is the best type of show for girls who just don't want a relationship at the moment. All they do is string guys along and sleep with them. It's all about friends and being that confident, independent, sexy woman you are!
Every time I watch it, I feel like throwing on the highest pair of heels I've got and going out with you to go shopping! Forget guys! :) We are FABULOUS without them!
And don't believe those Chinese fortunes Wendy. They are all hocus pocus crap honestly. And don't take it to heart. How can a sheet of paper predict your future and determine your love life? No one can determine your future but you. Now, if you have that 'I'm going to be alone forever' mentality, you are setting yourself out that way.
You have standards girl,so don't settle for just anyone because you're afraid of being alone! You are so young and fabulous right now, who even needs a man? Go put those adorable Mary Jane heels on and go out and have fun :)
Don't think about finding guys now. There are billions of guys out there- albeit, most of them douche bags, but there is always The One out there for you! He will come by least when you expect it and will be amazed by how gorgeous, sweet, and wonderful you are. It all takes time girl, so don't dwell on aspect of being alone right now. Take it as an opportunity to thrive as a confident individual who isn't afraid of anything! There is plenty of time later for guys. Focus on YOU right now and be happy!
Aw, no worries. I'm not planning on dating anytime soon. Plus, it's too much work to ignore them. Haha, we do need to go shopping. But that reminds me, how's your plan to wear heels everyday going? I remember our long ass shopping trips caused my feet a lot of pain and I was wearing flats, so I don't know about actually going with heels
ReplyDeleteOh and I just remembered; I just bought this pair of nude almond toed heels that you will hate because they're only about two inches... I think. Can't wait to wear them in the spring!
Have fun watching Sex and the City. I don't want to watch anymore shows. I have too many.